The Lost Road of a Failed Gastric

In 1994, I had a RNY surgery. At 350 lbs and 26 years of age, I felt like my life was over, I felt like my husband and my offspring would be best off without me. I felt like I could not face life at all. Knowing that suicide was totally contrary to my religious beliefs, I had to find a solution and find one fast to get out of this prison titled a BODY. I heard from a friend throughout the RNY surgery and what it had done for her, she went from fat to fabulous what seemed to be overnight to me. Inside, I was desperate to find what she had done, so I named her doctor in Michigan, yes I did no research, I had no idea what it was all about, all I knew is, what she had and the results she had I had to have it, if it grown my life.

Long story short...I went to Michigan to have the RNY surgery. I was not scared until they wheeled me into the operating room, it looked like a chop shop, not what I had been a custom to with previous surgeries, but I was down for whatever, I put my life in God's hands and I went to sleep...you know God watches over treasures and Fools.

I was not prepared for what drastic changes and alterations that had taken place.

I had no sound eating advise, my doctor never said stay away from carbs ( what was carbs) , all I knew is that I would be thin in a couple of months ( 7-15 month). I had no support groups, no doctors in my area knowledgeable on the RNY and possible risk and care for RNY patients. I didn't know I was not supposed to drink sods pop, I didn't know I wasn't supposed to eat and drink at the same time, all I knew is that I would be thin....now I did hear but I did not exercise, drink plenty of water, take vitamins daily, come for yearly check-up....all I heard is that the weight will come off and you will be thin. I can't leave out I was told all round the dumping but I was not told that it would stop, so as a hard head person, I ate sweets as much as could be tolerated, you know a compote bar here and there, a piece of cake here and there.

Two babies later( Dec. 1996 & Jan.1998) I found that my 199 lbs body was getting to tight for my clothes, and I was sale bigger sizes even hind the pregnancies, even when there was no baby people thought I was pregnant....Now spinning out of control and wondering what went wrong, and so fast...I knew I had to do something, but what....... I did not know, remember no support groups, limited information, and new procedure in my area ( I was only sensible of of the surgery actual done in Michigan 6-7 hours away - one way).

Feeling sluggish and trying to mother my family and my husband I couldn't get a handle of my tiredness and why I was not feeling like myself. Every meal the pregnancy was a meal of convenience meaning something that won't make me sick, and something that didn't require me to be on my feet for a long time, so I opted for fast food, I ate pizza at least 3-4 out of 7 days, hey it's the only food I can feed a family of 8 for under $16.00 for 2 extra large one topping pizza's.

Now the scale is tipping 250 lbs and every month I see a pound creep on here and there but, hey... I think I got this....then I wake up from this dream with severe anemia, and 181 B-12 level, mild memory loss, and all the old symptoms of Lupus (soreness, stiffness, and joint pain).

10 years wiser, I began to take my life back by using proper supplementation, and regular doctor visits, but why is the weight not in reserve off, I'm logging my food, I'm exercising, I even got a personal trainer, and still something was wrong, and I became tired of going to the gym 2-3 times a day for 1.5-2 hour a time.

I began to reach out for help, even though I was shame when people found out I had a RNY several years ago. I got sick of people address me what happen, your still fat, as if I couldn't see that every time I ran by the mirror...you know...... I was a diva from the shoulders up( I was frequently told I had a pretty face), so I thought,...... but what speaking of the rest of me. I was fooling myself, and every time I went up a flight of stairs, I knew that rest of me needed the electronic surveillance that I gave my face.

After much soul searching and research, I decided to have the lap band near my RNY pouch. I knew it was a fairly new procedure but here I go again, that's what my husband said, then I would reply but I'm not that same old Lana, I'm 10 years wiser and I see the fault in me, and my surgeon which genesis me not be successful in 1994, so don't put me on the HISTORY rifle achieve I got a new preview, staring the sensible Lana who loves herself, and who has learned that you don't get nothing in life for free. You pay for everything you get and everything you get you pay for( with regards to the WLS Surgery).

AND HERE I AM brindle AND LOVIN IT!